Midnight Entry # 5 - In Which He Writes About Loss and is Humbled

I think I might've jinxed my good luck by writing about it.

I'm sure those of you on my YM list know that I lost my phone recently. It was pretty stupid of me actually - it was 2:30 in the morning, I had just finished writing the previous entry, and was in McDonald's Katipunan with my roommate happily munching away on McNuggets and salty fries. And there - I think I might've left my phone on the table when we walked back home.

By the time I had realized my phone was missing (around an hour later, I believe) it was already turned off and I couldn't contact it anymore. I walked to McDo at 4:00 and ended up going through the trash bins with the server on duty to see if he "accidentally" threw it away.

That really ruined my day. Because I didn't have my phone anymore - hence no alarm clock - I wasn't able to wake up at 8:00 later that morning and ended up standing up my groupmates at an important meeting. I woke up at 10:00, ran to school for my 10:45 Th151 orals with Andrew, and ended up totally screwing it up.

You can probably imagine how pissed I was for the rest of the day because my good luck seemed to have turned so quickly. Strange, though, that I wasn't as depressed as I thought I would be; maybe the positive vibes from the past week were still rubbing off on me, I don't know.

Thankfully, my parents didn't get mad when I told them that I lost my phone - I mean, after all, I haven't bought a new phone in four years, and that phone was just a hand-me-down from my dad. Oh, and it just came free with a postpaid plan too.

Anyway - I was smoking in front of the condo, telling Anna and Ding about how unlucky I suddenly was, when two street kids came along to ask me for loose change. I was still bitching about my phone, so I gave them the cold shoulder and kept on ranting.

Anna and Ding went up to the condo and I hadn't finished my stick yet, so I ended up sitting alone on the front steps. The two kids sat beside me and kept asking me for loose change, so I gave them six pesos to split between themselves.

The younger of the two kids, a little girl barely old enough to talk, then pointed to the Havaianas I was wearing:

Kuya, ang ganda naman ng tsinelas mo. Akin na lang! Wala akong tsinelas o.
[Big brother, you have such nice slippers. Can I have them? Look I don't have slippers on.]

She then lifted her legs to show me her bare feet.

Feeling a little goofy, I told her:

Ngek. Madadapa ka 'pag sinuot mo 'to no. Tingnan mo wala pang kalahati ng paa ko 'yung paa mo.
[What? You'll trip if you wear these, you know. Look - your foot isn't even half mine!]

I put the sole of my foot opposite hers to show her the size disparity.

She then said:

Kuya nasira kasi tsinelas ko eh. Sabi ng nanay ko bibili kami ng tsinelas diyan sa palengke pag may pera na kami. Sana sa susunod na linggo.
[But big brother, I broke my slippers. My mom says that we're going to buy new ones at the market when we have the money already. Hopefully that'll be next week.]

I kept quiet for a while; I didn't know what to say.

She then goes:

Kuya, alam mo ba, namatay nung nakaraang linggo yung dalawa kong kapatid. Ako na lang yung baby sa bahay ngayon. Ay hindi pala, nanganak ulit si nanay - tatlo na ulit kaming bata sa bahay.
[Big brother, do you know that my two siblings died last week? I'm the only baby left at home now. No, wait - my mom just gave birth again - we're three kids at home now.]

Surprised, I asked her what her siblings died of.

She said:

Nakakain daw kasi sila ng masamang bacteria - ayun 'di naman po namin kaya sila ipa-ospital. Namatay na lang po sila.
[They supposedly ingested some sort of harmful bacteria, apparently. We couldn't afford to send them to the hospital, so there - they died.]

Then she smiles.

That incident made me feel so ashamed of myself.